Ask About God (AskAboutGodBlog.com)

This blog is offered as a place to ask questions about God, the Bible, and Christian living. Reasonable questions will be answered honestly. Send your questions to AskAboutGod@gmail.com. Details...

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My identity for this blog is James Klein, however that is not my real name. I am a Christian of 35+ years with sufficient life experience and Bible training to answer questions. I am not a pastor or church leader, but I regularly attend and participate in a church located somewhere in the United States of America. Details...

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Faith of My Father

Recently God has pressed on my heart the memory of my father, who passed away two years ago on September 30 2008.

Proverbs 22:6 - Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. (NIV)

I remember as a child, our church had pre-service prayer in a room back behind the main auditorium. My father would make us kids go back to the prayer room with him and my mom, and we couldn’t play around, we had to kneel down and pray with them. After only a few minutes I was prayed out and anxious to get out of there, but I had to stay, and keep praying. I didn’t understand how people there were able to keep thinking about more things to pray about. I still don’t like to pray for long periods, and my conversations with God now are usually much shorter and far less formal than those childhood prayer times, but thanks to my father I now understand the importance of prayer.

I remember as a child, my father would make us kids spend time reading the Bible. This wasn’t a formal family Bible read (although we did that too), rather we were expected to set aside time out of our own day, and go read the Bible for ourselves. Every so often dad would check up on us, and if we had slacked off and stopped doing it he would make us get started again. It is mostly thanks to my father, that I am now able to remember so much of what is in the Bible.

I remember as a child, my father would often spontaneously stand up and declare an exhortation, instruction or prophetic word to the people. My dad had the gift of prophesy, and at one time the church even considered placing him in a formal position as church prophet. I was amazed at how he could just stand up and speak the heart of God as if God had taken over his mouth. I wondered how anyone could hear God so clearly. I understand now that what my dad had wasn’t clarity of what God was saying, it was faith. I also know that I have inherited that same gift. When I go back to proofread these blog entries I am just as amazed to see God’s fingerprints all over them. All I do is faithfully type out what is on my heart, and God’s connection with me, is shared with the world.

Matthew 24:45-47 - “Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time? It will be good for that servant whose master finds him doing so when he returns. I tell you the truth, he will put him in charge of all his possessions.” (NIV)

My father was a servant to God, to his family, and to his church. For most of my life my dad ran his own business, which often required him to stay at work late, and even overnight, to provide for his family. Nevertheless, we always had good food on the table and good clothing. When my dad was a child he had grown up in a poor family, so he made sure that his family never had to experienced the same struggles as he had. He might not have been able to afford to give us kids allowance very often, and we may have had a black and white TV a few years after the neighbors had color, and we might not have taken any trips to Disneyland, but my mom never had to work, and we never went without.

My dad spent many days of volunteer work maintaining the church. He was the one who changed the burned out light bulbs, fixed the broken toilets, and repaired the furnace so we would have heat Sunday morning. The week before he died he was at the church repairing the plumbing. The last project I did with my dad was to help him construct wooden doorstops for when the church auditorium gets too hot. The night before he died my dad was at church attending a special Monday night meeting with a guest speaker. My dad loved the church, and he gave his all for them.

My dad’s death was sudden and unexpected. I was at work when it happened, and had gone out to lunch, when the emergency call came from my mother. My dad was actually in good health and was working at rebuilding the shed on the back of his property. His sudden death impacted a lot of people, and his absence is still felt in all of the areas where he used to serve. You never realize just how significant someone is, until after they are gone. The influence my father had on the lives of others was demonstrated in their gratitude and kindness after he died. The memorial service filled the 400 person auditorium of the church, and we had to cut short the many stories and statements of gratitude for lack of time. My family was offered so many meals during our time of sorrow that we had to turn several of them down. The financial help we received from friends and family was easily twice as much as the cost of his burial, and many volunteers from the church and community came out to finish building the shed my dad was working on when he died.

John 12:24 - I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. (NIV)

Before he died, my father was in charge of the men’s prayer group at the church. He kept a log of who attended, and on many weeks there was no one there but him, yet he continued praying faithfully every week. My dad stood as a greeter at the door of the church every Sunday, welcoming friends and visitors. To each new person who came in my dad would give a copy of the book “Larger Window”, which he purchased at his own expense just to give away. He made CD and DVD recordings of messages from the internet about prayer, revival and healing, which he also gave away at the door. He was always talking about healing and revival. He dreamed of starting his own healing ministry with my mother, and had printed cards he would give out, offering to pray for people. He and my mother would even go out regularly to local shopping malls, praying and looking for opportunities to pray for people. My dad believed that the church today can become like the church of Acts. This was my dad, and although his feet were smaller than mine, I am sure I will never be able to fill his shoes, nor will anyone else.

My father’s vision is not dead. I cannot count how many times since his death I have heard a message that sounded just like something he might say. Even the healings and miracles my dad longed to see are starting to manifest now. I still don’t know what God has in store for my church, or for me, but I know that my dad had a significant role and purpose. I thank God for my father’s vision, and for his faith to share it and pass it on to others, and I pray that when my time comes, I will be able to show myself just as worthy and faithful to God, as he was…

With love and honor, to my earthly father, and my Heavenly Father.

Exodus 20:12 - “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you. (NIV)



James :)

Friday, October 15, 2010

Girlfriends and Relationships

A visitor wrote…
Hello! It's been quite some time since I last sent you a question. Ive kept on reading your answers for other questions since I sent mine. And I think its the right time to send another question that I ache to know. This is more of a doubt about what should I do and if there is something in the bible that could perhaps guide my way in here.

Here is the problem. I broke up with my ex girlfriend after being in a relationship with her for over a year. Over that time, and confesing it feels really bad, we fornicated once or twice a month. Since I started doing that i felt really bad, and I felt guilty for doing so, but I just couldn't control myself wheen in that situations. With time, and with all the accumulated guilt i stopped communig with god, I stopped praying in the nights before i went to sleep. Now, although I know this is bad, this is not my main doubt here.

The thing is that, for my whole life i've been asking the lord for a girl to be my side who's got a certain list of qualities. Amngst the things I looked for was for her to be humble, for her not to drink or smoke, for her to be a home person (that is that she'd much rather stay home and watch a movie or play some boardgames than go to a club or to a party), for her to be a good cook, and for her to be smart, and recently I prayed the lord for her to be a christian, not a chatolic, but a cristian who should fear and respect the lord. Now, my ex-girlfriend had some of those things, but she lacked some others, specially, she likes to go clubbing and she's not christian.

Now, after all this things happened, and talking to the leader of my church, i eralized how wrong was I, so I decided to end the relationship with her. I was really afraid of doing so, because she was all to which I was used to, and leaving her really frightened me But i kept on asking the lord for a clue as to what to do since i was utterly confused.

Then in the middle of that struggle with myself I got to know a girl... James... I really think this girl is the person i've been asking the lord for MY WHOLE LIFE. She's got absolutely every single trait i've always asked the lord to give me, and she's a christian just like me, she's genuinely humble. and she's been a crhsitian her whole life. I got to know her parents, they are an amazing couple. James this girl is just amazing!

Anyway, moving on... a couple weeks after i met her i got into a trouble with my girlfriend because she spied on me and got to know about this other girl so she broke with me, which made things easier for me... now then... fastforward a couple months.. she's not my girlfriend yet, she's still my ex, but we talk a lot to each other... and she added this other girl... (lets call Alpha my ex and BETA the oother girl so its easier) so alpha added beta and, since beta is such a nice and humble person she acceptd her.

Now, I really want to get to something with beta, but she's told me that she can't even risk it because alpha is her friend... and... truth is they barely know each other, and alpha just added beta to keep an eye on her.

NOw here is my doubt... am I wrong? Is she not the girl I've been asking the lord for? How can I know if she is the one for me or not? HOw can I takl with her to make her understand that I LOVE HER? Does god want us to be together? Is there anything on the bible that resembles this scenario? something about not being able to be with the person whom you want to be because of mischiveous others?

and on a side note, if I fornicate, and I kept on doing so, am I being an hy´pocrite to god? can I talk to him even if I kept on doing those things?

Now If I am understanding the situation correctly, you have ended the relationship with your old girlfriend (Alpha) and met a new girl (Beta), but when your old girlfriend (Alpha) found out about the new girl (Beta), she (Alpha) became friends with the new girl (Beta), and now the new girl (Beta) is uncomfortable with becoming your new girlfriend because she (Beta) doesn’t want to hurt your old girlfriend (Alpha).


Your first question (paraphrased):What should I do about the situation with my ex girlfriend and this new girl?

This is not easy to address because unfortunately I only have your perspective to consider, so I do not have a complete picture of the situation. Someone might easily read from what you wrote that your old girlfriend is being very manipulative in this situation, but I would be judging her if I made that assumption without knowing anything about her, and that would be wrong. Your best place for seeking advice about this is to talk some more with the church leader you mentioned, who can work with you directly. It is impossible for me to give council at the detail that seems to be needed here in the format of this blog.

Since your old girlfriend is not a Christian she cannot be expected to behave like one. If her intent actually is to interfere with you having a relationship with the new girl as you seem to be implying, there is very little you can do about it except to pray and ask God to expose the truth. If the new girl is as close to God as she should be from being a Christian her whole life, she will quickly see through any manipulation and do what is right.

As for what you need to do… Do not talk bad about the old girlfriend to the new girl. Do not lie to the old girlfriend about the new girl. Treat both girls with respect and honor, even if you don’t feel like they deserve it. Conduct yourself as the Christian that you are (and trust me, you are a Christian).


Your second question:How do I know whether this new girl is the right girl for me to pursue?

If this new girl is the one God has chosen for you, trust God to open the door, and do not be anxious about creating a certain kind of relationship just because you desire it. The key to having a good relationship with anyone is to die to yourself. Your first priority for any relationship should be to give of yourself to the other person, not to receive anything from them for yourself.

Too many young people try to rush into a relationship instead of letting God work things out, and as a result they make the same mistake that Abraham did when God promised him a son (Isaac) (Genesis 15:2-6). Abraham’s attempts to hurry God along resulted in Ishmael (Genesis 16:1-4). Now God did not reject Ishmael, but it was Isaac whom God made His covenant with (Genesis 17:17-21).

It may surprise you to learn that I myself am not yet married, nor do I have a girlfriend. I have seen many friends and family get married, and more than a few get divorced over the years. Like you I have been seeking the Lord to send me the right girl, for many years. He hasn’t shown her to me yet, but I know that He will at the right time. Do not be anxious. Trust God.


Your third question:What about my sin of having sex with my old girlfriend outside of marriage after becoming a Christian?

You need to understand that your sin isn’t hurting God, it is only hurting you. God doesn’t see you in the light of the sins you commit, He sees you in the light of Christ, as perfect and blameless. Your sins can never tarnish or break through the shield that Christ’s blood provides. You are a Christian. You are one of God’s most prized possessions. He wants you to keep talking to Him, no matter how bad you messed up.

Now buck up and start doing what you know you are supposed to be doing. Continuing sex before it is made right through marriage will only ruin the experience that God intends for you to have when the time is right.

You CAN do it brother! Return to praying every night like you used to. Ask God to take away your guilt, and stop adding more to it yourself. Spend time with your church, and fellowship with good Christian couples who have been married long enough to have experience you can learn from.


God bless you.

James :)